“Shadow” Self…

I often share with people that I am not afraid of my shadow self; ya know what I mean, the one  that is dark and negative and complaining and in pain…the one you want no one to see for the most part.

My shadow saved my ass throughout most of my life. She did her job when i was 41 & started revealing things to me about me and my past that she knew I would only believe if SHE told me…and I listened.

The shadow self for me has never been my ‘boogey man’; that’s a position that was always reserved for the humans in my life. So as I waft through the internet and I see people sharing things like “can I be scary honest here”…with a computer that’s easy. I believe that God brings us ALL to a point of ourselves; looking at our own shadow is the only way to see the TRUE light of God.

Then, and only then, does it cease to matter what people call God; I am talking complete & free lack of judgment in the cranium once I accepted my shadow…

She is my intuition. She is the part of me whom I trust the most with myself. She has never, ever intended harm to me in any way; nor will she ever…even though she is a shadow she is the truest part of me…the purest part of me; then who loves like God and shares that with others…

and yet I hide her often because people are not worthy of knowing her (Just figured that out recently and whew what a joyous release that is) I don’t hide her because of fear…I hide her because most people aren’t safe or worthy to know her.

She is my true connection to the Spirit in me…and what I mean is it is not until I face her; and love her; that I am able to see or live like God. The very thing that scares also is the very vessel God often uses to draw me to him.

I have no secret self. Anyone that knows me mostly knows of the truths because I KNOW THEM. I know my difficulties in this life and I share them. No shame. No guilt just honest truth about The Self That Knows.

Love & Grace.

Posted in BPD

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