Inside Me…Outside Me…

There is really nothing more to say to this because it is truth. This is what happens as I am going to bed…no matter what late night rituals I have, and I have developed some really good ones; my head seems to come alive with every single worry, every single thing I have ever done wrong, particularly in that day; and I have told those that say they love me about this and yet i keep finding stuff being piled on and on and on…

Sometimes I just need someone outside of me to help me quiet that noise, that color, by simply answering a question; no agenda, no attitude when I ask, I just need a yes or no and poof its gone…

If/when people take that personal..I want to scream at the top of my lungs ‘this isn’t about you, I am trying to give me what I need to make it through the night’ and I get so tired of having to qualify that every time something comes out of my mouth particularly when tired or occupied.

Sometimes i just can’t quiet down the noise and i need your help. i don’t always have the words for that and i just ask that you don’t take it personally because in that moment, words might not be perfect.





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