I Did It!

I have finally overcome a 22+ year old fear; you know the one. It haunts you in your dreams, it screams at you around every corner of your waking hours…


I think as I grow older and hopefully maturing, I am learning the secret to living a quality life is learning that there is no such thing as ‘enough’. When I am on that cycle, whether other voices or mine, there is just no getting around it…there will never be enough.

I have also learned that the only way to remove that voice/those tapes, is to just DO IT!! What ever that it is that I am not good enough for…and ya know, that is what happened today…I just did it!!

No voices telling me I can’t, just me pushing along, not even hearing the fear tape but recognizing the gynormity of how long it has been since wanting and actually doing had met up…

I bought some essential oils as a christmas present for myself and I have been using them in my amazing diffuser and today that just wasn’t enough. I had to figure out how to use a carrier oil so I could put the oils directly on my skin…and so…I just did it.

I feel an unholy pride in the fact that I have two containers, one with lavender and eucalyptus and the other peppermint, that can now be applied directly to my body…wherever the need is.

The lavender and eucalyptus together creates a wonderful combination for my asthma/sinus stuff…the eucalyptus is a holy healer, a decongestion that opens my lungs up right away while the lavender keeps the rest of me calm…

The peppermint will be used when I need peace, and when I need to quiet a headache and also when I need to feel rejuvenated and revived. These are all pure oils and the peppermint is cooling so it reduces muscle tension and tightness in my lungs as well.

I am so grateful I am stepping into the shoes of my almost forgotten soul. To be able to walk with pride about who I am and who I’m becoming is truly a beautiful thing. I am deeply grateful.

Blessed Be.


January 28, 2017 at 2:30m


God Rest…

It’s beginning to look a lot like Yuletide….

Happy December Friends and good morning to you all.

Just passing through on my way to an enriching cup of coffee and getting this sock done I’m working on and wanted to say good morning to all you beautiful souls and wish the the most beautiful day ever!!

Have a wonderful day and continue to be the blessing that you ARE.

Much Love



Beyond Thankful…

I am thankful every day for something. This holiday is truly just another day; sure there is different food and maybe(not for me) family but it is truly just another day.

When your life has been transformed, when you are sitting in your own home, the one YOU created, in a place you have always wanted to live, with all of the things (like a bed, a roof, and food) that you did not usually have…every day there most surely is something to be grateful for.

Gratitude is not something I often write about or talk about because there were so many years when i truly couldn’t see or feel anything to be grateful for AND there were so many years (pre mental diagnosis) where no matter who or what was around me I just couldn’t quite be grateful.

I know what it is like to have family and ‘stuff’ crammed down your throat this time of year if you are struggling. I know that struggle. I am writing this to remind you that everything changes. Everything changes.

Last month it was everything I could do not to start carving on my arms again just to quiet my mind because of the chaos….today I haven’t thought once about carving on myself and for that..there are no words to describe how thankful i am for that.

Please hang in there. If you ain’t feeling all of this gratitude stuff, HANG IN THERE. One day you may very well realize that gratitude isn’t reserved for one day, it isn’t about listing the things you’re grateful for…it is about the deeper than deep realization that you are meant to be here. In your darkness. In your light. YOU are meant to be here. No amount of words or anything else can articulate that knowing once you ‘know it’…it goes beyond gratitude into a richness beyond description.

THAT is how much gratitude is in my heart today. I am so grateful I hung it out and didn’t give up.

May you be in a place today where you are fully and completely free to be whomever you are in this exact moment.

Much Love & Blessings…



Sock Junkie…

I think it’s happened…

Three pairs in and I’m hooked. Not just because they are a simple project. Not just because  they are quick and easy to ‘kick out’ but rather because the  yarn is so wonderful and actually creating something that I can wear is nothing short of a miracle…for real.

I have ordered 8 skeins (the dark blue one in photo is for my sister) of fingering weight yarn all for the purpose of creating beautiful and happy feet…

I love the simplicity of a sock. I love that once I memorize the pattern, I don’t have to look at it anymore and I can even watch tv when knitting and purling.

I love that I persevered and had to gun-ho-ness to figure out how to finally make socks. I say finally because I have tried several times and it seems like in knitting, as in life, that what I try to do may not be succeeding in the moment because it isn’t the right moment…

So I persevered. I love creating something with my own two hands. I can get as sporadic with colors as I want. It is totally up to me.

I love that.

Perseverance and letting go all at the same time..in October I have made a total of three (plus one) pairs of socks already and I am gonna keep going. It brings me great pleasure…

Now to get my mom’s size foot…

Rainbow Colored yarn is called Unicorn Poop…I mean come on 😛

Much Love



String Art :)

I am very blessed! My chosen sister, Meegan came down with my nephew Sunday and left last night and she is such a beautiful woman. She believes in me and loves me all the time; all the way to the moon and back!!

So the other day in my pursuit of all things creative; I came across something that was popular in the 70’s, made a comeback in the 80’s and 90’s and both times I missed out…until this last week!

I talked to her about how very much I would absolutely dig making string art for my empty living room wall…she has an engineering brain and said ‘okay no problem’! I told her what it looked like we needed and she brought it all…and we went and got some wood scraps and today is the unveiling of my very first piece of string art.

I love the process; it juices my creativity and it is fun…and it seems to be attached, for me, with a lot of emotion (what isn’t) but this is old soul emotion…of which I have yet to figure out..

Having said all that I am only left with TA DA….

1st string Art 7715
…Is ALL that matters!!

Love & Blessings



So I am sitting here in my home, at the dining room table, which looks like the Creative Faiery dumped a bucket load of goodness on, I just got done with 2nd string art project and I am in the middle, listen to the pause…

And it dawns on me how full I feel. I have believed in the marrow of my bones for a very long time that being creative is the closest thing I can get the My Creator…and it is as close as my breathe this morning.

I feel connected. I feel At-One-ment; my heart brimming over with gratitude….gratitude because I no longer have the shaming voices or the ‘oh no you can’t’ voices in my head when I want to be creative…and that is an amazing thing. It is a gift to be sure. I have opened it and am sitting smack dab int he middle of The Present..

Deep breathe and time to get my first cup of coffee..

All is well with my soul.

Love & Blessings.